Self Love

Today's message dedicated to my sisters who find themselves on skid row in downtown LA. It's hard to believe that just one year ago, were it not for the help of my family and friends, I could have been there too.

I am so grateful to be part of @neverturnawayawoman! A fundraiser/art show that will raise money and awareness to help women who find themselves in this predicament. Please follow the page @neverturnawayawoman https://www.instagram.com/neverturnawayawoman/

Only when you can see and love ALL of yourself, will you be able to accommodate someone else seeing and loving all of you.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman
#neverturnawayawoman #support #love #artgallery #art #writer #skidrowwoman

cURvY mE

I’ll keep my curves, thank you very much.

I don’t need you to straighten them out,

press them in, or

lift them up.

I like them soft, round, off-kilter,

imperfectly perfect just as they are.

I no longer need to iron them out to

look like an object you approve of,

that fits nicely on your arm

so you can feel powerful and in control.

I’ve spent a lifetime adjusting so as not to scare you.

The truth is my curviness scares the fuck out of you,

something I knew before I knew it.

The days of making myself small so you can feel big,

of looking for someone to save me,

giving my power to those weaker than me

are over.

I now see I’m the strongest person I know.

I’ve sat alone, suffering,

sunken to the dark depths of my soul,

with no bandage, no caress.

Just me and the Great Mystery.

And no doubt I will do it again.

So yes, I am strong.

But whereas fear used to make me strong like steel,

now, unafraid, I am strong like the willow.

I trust the circles and cycles and bendy ways I don’t understand.

I breathe,

I undulate,

I allow the flow,

so the winds of life don’t break me.

I don’t need you to take fat from my thighs

and put in my breasts for god sake!

I’m well aware that

my lips are too thin,

boobs too small,

nose too big,

butt too round.

And I don’t give a flying fuck,

or a good goddamn.

Not one more second will be wasted

on trying to be who someone else thinks I should be.

Every precious moment

will be spent being who I am.

I love me, all of me,

especially the unlovable parts.

I will love those so hard.

I will love the hell out of them,

love them until they are lovable.

I will never allow pop culture

to lobotomize my “me”

until I’m a shell with fake everything

and a knock-off Prada bag

I bought with a maxed-out credit card

so I could look like who I’m supposed to.

Fuck that!

There are no holes in my wholeness

for your toxic fixing to seep through.

You can keep your knife,

your anti-aging,

anti-cellulite,

anti-wrinkle,

anti-everything-unique-to-me

cream.

You are wasting your time with me.

I won’t be framed, frozen, straightened, flattened, dulled,

ironed out, sucked in, or contorted

to fit in your box.

Curves and boxes don’t mix.

And I am a curve,

with unpredictable,

inconvenient intuition

that just might out you.

I will never again put a lid on it

to make you feel safe.

I am lidless, curvy, everything.

I am ME.

I don’t fit.

I am not supposed to.

I long ago made it off the rat wheel

of starving to make myself

and remorsefully binging because

I didn’t, couldn’t, or wouldn't fit.

I will never go back.

I stand before you a verb

of cultivated, hard won BALANCE,

no addictions.

nothing to hide.

Considering where I came from

that just may be a modern day miracle.

It certainly makes me a

freak of nature to those

who don’t understand the

great power of self-awareness;

and a fine specimen to those who do.

From the invisible parts you’ll never see,

to the outside which you surmise, size-up,

and approve or denounce,

I am real,

alive,

ever-evolving,

sometimes messy,

not always pretty,

but always beautiful,

the most beautiful,

incomparable version

of the one and only

ME.

Evolved Ideas Embodied

Evolved ideas contribute more to collective evolution when embodied by individuals, rather than read, thought or talked about by individuals.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman

Feminine Power

I wrote this two days before my divorce trial in August. Have been hesitant to share because of the f-bomb. But I can't think of a better time. So here it is and pardon my french...

A woman standing in her power is a force to be reckoned with, not to be fucked with.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman #femininepower #nonviolent #strong #shakti

Evolutionary Heat

We may not be chickens; even so we are required to peck our way out of karmic shells that we may be strong enough to survive the heat of our own evolution.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman #tapas

Relish Rejection

Learn to LOVE rejection. It means you're living boldly and taking risks.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman

Happy regardless of not because of

This is really possible and the only true liberation...

By the power vested in me by no one, I give you permission to be ridiculously happy regardless of your circumstances.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman

Unfiltered Expression

Because everyone needs a place, a way to unabashedly express...free of the inner and outer critics, no filter, uncensored, raw creativity...your unique brand. That's why...

I have a secret journal where I write things even my regular journal can't know about ;) ;)

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman

Relationships worth cultivating

Relationships with people who need you to need them are not healthy. The only relationships worth cultivating are with those secure enough to support you when you're down and celebrate with you when your up.

Alison Bristow
#theshaktishaman